Measuring Time.....

When challenges come up in my life, I often find myself finding ways to measure time. Right now, I am measuring time by my calendar and the doctor appointments that fill my week. I can't help but do this. Madilyn is scheduled to have surgery on March 15th. It is like the end of a race for us. We mark off days until we will arrive at our destination.

I know that I have to make it until next Wednesday, March 3rd, when we go see our Neurosurgeon, Dr. Reisner. We are headed to his office for our 6 month check up. It is hard to believe that 6 months ago I waited 6 long hours in a tiny room waiting for her spinal surgery to be complete. We will discuss with Dr. Reisner, what the last 6 months have been like. I trust him completely with the care of my Madilyn. He will be saddened because of her bowel situation. He will be gentle and kind. That is just how he is. He is so familiar with Madilyn that he doesn't have to review her chart. He told me that every now and then you get a case that never leaves your mind because of the complexity. That is Madilyn.

The next week we go to see Joe. He makes all kinds of things for Madilyn's right leg. She will be fitted for her compression stocking that will become a fixture on her right foot. She chose "hot pink". That is Madilyn for you....It will be the cutest stocking ever!

Measuring time....after this we will be making a pre-surgical trip to Egleston. Finalizing all the paperwork and going for more blood work. Madilyn knows the drill.

I hope that I will someday process all of this and not measure time in doctors appointments. I am not sure how to do that. After we have this surgery, there will be more doctors appointments and more trips to Children's. We will be entering a new phase in her care. I have my fears. I have my reservations. But, I know that this is the place we need to be and we are doing what is best for Madilyn.

Maybe tonight I will let it go and just enjoy watching Scooby Do with Madilyn before we bring this day to a close.